In Far inside, the visitor experiences life with schizophrenia. In this spatial experience you feel the lost of control on reality. The original interviews with Ton are the red line in this installation to give an impression of reality through his eyes. Writer Karin Anema describes how Ton battles his psychoses to get his life together in her book ‘ Today I will buy all colours’.
De belevingswereld van iemand in een psychose is nauwelijks invoelbaar; ook niet voor degenen die elke dag met ze werken. Tijdens deze Virtual Reality workshop ervaar je de beangstigende denkbeelden, visuele hallucinaties, en de impact op het leven van iemand die langdurig psychotisch is geweest. Het is tegelijkertijd een illustratie van controleverlies en angst.
“I am Ton. My whole life I searched for a true connection with somebodyto share my thoughts and feelings. I’ve had psychoses, which manifestedthemselves visually in fears and delusions. After this, a second periodcame which opened an unconsciously reservoir filled with an endlessflood of all kind of data, names and places. The psychoses repeated themselves.In contact with other, there still seem to be a gap between them and me.
It took more than thirty years to bring outside and inside closer together.I took controle of my fears by painting and ordening. An outsider mightnotice some oddity but I am capable of living a normal life, despite the social isolation.”
